VH1's 'What Chilli Wants' review: When we make finding love difficult

We have had the pleasure of watching 'What Chilli Wants' for the last two episodes and it has brought up some good points I think we all could learn from.  Chilli has a 'list' of qualities that she uses when choosing a boyfriend and if he doesn't meet those requirements, she doesn't give him the time of day.  The qualities include being 'well-endowded," "have a 4 or 6-pack," and, last but not least, not to eat pork.  This may sound silly to some, but to some of us singles, we have have a 'list' that we run down every time we meet somebody.  We may not consider it a list, but we have a set of requirements when picking a partner.

Ladies, do you want a man who is muscular, tall with a nice smile and demur personality, well that is your list.  Men, do you want a lady with a nice shape, can watch sports, and with a great personality, well that is your list.  You have to admit, some of the stuff on our list is quite superficial, but some stuff on our list has some history to it.  You might say you want a partner who is sensitive to your needs because in the past you have dealt with an insensitive boyfriend or girlfriend.  You might say you want a partner who can hang out with you and your friends because in the past your have dealt with somebody who did not get along with your friends for whatever reason.

It is okay to have a list, however, our list can become way too long.  It can be so difficult finding somebody because your requirements or lists have become so long, that it is hard for the average person to live up to your standards.  This is where Chilli finds herself on the show.  The truth is, love has no list or requirements. Love is blind in that aspect.  It is time that we cut some of the superficiality and unnecessary requirements off of our lists if we want to find somebody. Love has no shape, race, or no "six-pack."  When we come to realize this about love, it is then that we will began to tear down the walls and let people in.

Today, write down and write down an honest list about what you really look for in a person.  Each on a scrap of paper or note card.  Look at them and analyze them.  Try to weed out the unnecessary or superficial ones we talked about.  Look at those and study those.  Do any of those have any merit or meaning behind them.  9 times out of ten they will not have any meaning.  Tear the ones apart that you know you can absolutely do without, tear the piece of paper apart and in your mind discard these futile requirements because they ARE what is holding you back from finding that special someone.  Self-love is opening yourself up to new and exciting opportunities for love and not being bounded by stupid "lists" that hold you back!